Empathizer Communication Commandments


If you want to relate to your opposite communicator type (Instigators vs. Empathizers) better, in order to get faster results that last, you must appeal to their talk style. Remember, one size communicator shoe doesn’t fit all!  What will make Instigators or I-types take you seriously if you are an E-type (or Empathizer) and trust and respect you (if anything will!)….

DON’T SOUND LIKE A CRICKET. Fire back. Speak loudly. Give your opinion even when unsure in confident tone of phone. This shows urgency and caring to I-types.
BE DECISIVE. Make a decision and get on with your day, rather than ruminating or re-visiting or thinking about it all day long. Being wishy-washy and indecisive forms a communication barrier that turns Instigators off cold.
PUSH BACK. Push back and interrupt. To an I-type, respect is debating and testing ideas out. Speak out. Speak up. Repeat yourself. Stand up for your ideas.
MANAGE YOUR MOOD. You are very competent, so do not allow your mood, which changes like the weather, tell you anything different. Set your mood tone to motivate and focus when you’re not feeling good. Bad moods put dangerous fog on the two-way communicator highway.
STOP BEATING AROUND THE BUSH. Time is money. Get to the point, already! Don’t fret about making mistakes which you can correct later on. No one will notice. Give off a sense of urgency. To I-types, time is money, and use of time instills self-worth.
ACT CONFIDENTLY. Speak up. Volunteer to do what you think might not be possible. Exude confidence when you are feeling low. Project a sense of urgency in your voice tone. Move in large movements and take up physical space. Use “lion” eye contact. Be the I-type who says, “Do something…right or wrong…just do something NOW!”
CORK THE EMOTIONAL VOLCANOES. Let go of the past. There is a time and season to forget about a past relationship and to push forward to the next change destination. Forgive the person. Stop dwelling and selling yourself doom and gloom. Get on down the road. Get ‘er done! E-types are experienced as “emotional volcanoes, “holding resentments non-verbally until it’s too late to hold back any longer. Then the explosion occurs, and the lava flows and shock waves are sent thoughout the I-type world. Then, the I-type lament: “It came out of the blue. I didn’t see it coming!”

Dr. Dennis O’Grady is the researcher and developer of the TALK2ME SYSTEM that works wonders with little effort. 937-428-0724.

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