Telephone Etiquette Can Be a Real Hang Up

Feeling more than a bit stressed lately with backed-up phone calls that need to be returned and e-mail pouring in like rain through a leaky roof? Who isn’t? Some days, it seems there’s hardly time to catch your breath or gather your thoughts as you pick up the next phone call. Other days, it feels like the phone simply won’t stop ringing.

Whether you work for a big company or your own small business, phone skills lead the day in getting your message heard and your mission accomplished.

IS YOUR PLATE TOO FULL?

Let’s count the ways you might feel squeezed: You’ve got to manage shrinking time…be a grammatical expert…computer wizard……salesperson…niche marketer…positive communicator…public relations guru…crisis manager…file organizer…success-oriented thinker…dedicated spouse…co-parenting wonder…whew! Nowadays, all tasks seem increasingly important and urgent. And just when you feel caught up, there are new twists and turns to learn in your job.

8 TIPS TO COPE FAST WITH TELEPHONE STRESS

Here are eight tips to cope fast with telephone stress:

1. Respond caringly to the mood of the caller.
Talk Positively: To respond caringly, stop whatever else you’re doing while you’re on the phone. Speak at the same pace and smile across the miles separating you and the caller. This is not the time to multitask or click away on your keyboard at a separate task while you’re talking/listening. Be positive-not distracted. As a rule, do you listen more than you speak?

2. Exude empathy and warmth to all callers.
Talk Positively: To be empathetic and warm, you must genuinely like people and know that what you can do for the caller is more important than what they can do for you. Take a deep breath and focus your mind before you get on the line. Determine what you need to focus on to spend time wisely with your caller. Monitor the tone of your voice. Doesn’t every single customer deserve to bask in your warm demeanor and feel first in the talk line?

3. Pass along the positive vibes.
Talk Positively: Avoid mumbling, grumbling, complaining or acting as if your time is available only for more urgent and important people and projects. A sure turn-off is to make excuses: “You just don’t understand.” “There’s never enough time in the day.” “That’s not how it’s done around here.” “I wish I could help you but…” “Honestly you’ve got it all wrong.” You’ll be the hero if you can provide answers and move the job along closer to completion in these fast-changing times.

4. Don’t hedge your bets.
Talk Positively: When you truly can’t do something, please say so. If you have no intention or delivering or coming through, don’t promise to do something in order to save face or get someone off your back. When you say you will do something, set a specific date and make a verbal guarantee of specific results. Strive to keep your promises knowing this: “Talk is cheap but results priceless.” Doesn’t your reputation or legacy take shape and grow long after you hang up the phone? And remember, learning to say “no” is a well-learned skill.

5. Be the first to apologize for a mix-up.
Talk Positively: Because callers take things so personally, and because you can’t read the nonverbal cues when a caller feels confused, sincerely apologize for glitches, foul-ups or mistakes even when you might not have been at fault. Interrupting the flow of talk to make your point is like cutting across busy traffic lanes on the freeway. Doing so will honk others off. Talking louder to make your point heard loses points and is the kiss of death in business dealings. Are you expecting yourself to travel to new destinations without adhering to rules of politeness on the talk road?

6. Repeat back messages verbatim.
Talk Positively: If you want to assume something, assume that you might not have heard completely what the speaker intended. Positive communicators summarize a lot along the way. Unfortunately, many time-crunched listeners mis-hear core issues, action items or forged agreements. Double-check by using this assertive refrain: “Let me make doubly sure that I’ve heard what you’re saying. Are you saying that…? Is that right?” Do you ever go on to subsequent talk points without first confirming with the speaker that you’ve clearly understood the core purpose at hand?

7. Speak accurately about negatives.
Talk Positively: Problem solving is a core business skill that many shy away from because of a fear of conflict or confrontation. Being positive but telling fibs or other inaccuracies is preaching pie in the sky. Being accurate about negatives is more down to earth and likely to get the job done by downsizing irritations. That’s why you must not try to soft-pedal negatives but hit them head on. Don’t you especially appreciate others’ candor and honesty when their Achilles Heel is exposed?

8. Balance professional courtesy with having some fun.
Talk Positively: Enjoy your work and the people around you who make a positive difference in this world. Enjoy your travels along the two-way communicator highway! Talk positively by relaying something about the caller that you sincerely appreciate. Poke fun at yourself or tell a joke that puts everyone in a good light. Share something personal without spilling your guts. Won’t all work and no play make you dull and boring to be around?

POSITIVE PHONE SKILLS AREN’T SMALL CHANGE

Positive phone skills aren’t small change. They are the currency that keeps every large or small business enterprise afloat during treacherous passages of change.

Dr. Dennis O’Grady is a communications trainer and psychologist from Dayton, Ohio, and the author of TALK TO ME: Communication Moves To Get Along With Anyone.

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