Have you ever looked at other people, all wrapped up in their own messy relationships and icky issues, and said to yourself, “Wo-wee! They’ve got some serious issues!” The implication, of course, is usually that those other people are difficult to deal with. But what does, “You’ve got some serious issues!” actually imply? What does it mean from the viewpoint of professional psychology? Long have psychologists researched and practiced in the field of personality styles and relationship dynamics in job and relationship performance. In fact, there are 11 “personality types” that explain why “impossible people” don’t think they are being difficult at all.
11 PERSONALITY STYLES IN EVERYDAY LIFE
What are the “standard personality disorders” that comprise a “talking mindset” whenever psychologists or executive coaches work with an “impossible person?” What personality types do psychologists keep in mind when they help a client cope better with an extremely difficult coworker, manager, boss or extended family member? Dr. Robert Hogan in “Personality and the Fate of Organizations,” deftly shows how “leadership and managerial performance are a direct function of a person’s personality, and, in turn, they directly influence the effectiveness of organizations.” Do any of these “thumbnail sketches of entrenched personality disorders” seem to fit the talk profile of an intimidator or constantly frustrating person?
1. BORDERLINE. Inappropriate anger, unstable and intense relationships alternating between idealization and devaluation.
2. PARANOID. Distrustful and suspicious of others; motives are interpreted as malevolent.
3. AVOIDANT. Social inhibition, feelings of inadequacy, and hypersensitivity to criticism or rejection.
4. SCHIZOID. Emotional coldness and detachment from social relationships; indifference to praise and criticism.
5. PASSIVE-AGGRESSIVE. Passive resistance to adequate social and occupational performance; irritation when asked to do something he or she does not want to do.
6. NARCISSISM. Arrogant and haughty behaviors or attitudes; grandiose sense of self-importance and entitlement.
7. ANTISOCIAL. Disregard for the truth; impulsivity and failure to plan ahead; failure to conform with social norms.
8. HISTRIONIC. Excessive emotionality and attention seeking; self-dramatizing, theatrical, and exaggerated emotional expression.
9. SCHIZOTYPAL. Odd beliefs or magical thinking; behavior or speech that is odd, eccentric, or peculiar.
10. OBSESSIVE-COMPULSIVE. Preoccupations with orderliness, rules, perfectionism, and control; over-conscientious and inflexible.
11. DEPENDENT. Difficulty making everyday decisions without excessive advice and reassurance; difficulty expressing disagreement out of fear of loss of support or approval.
DO YOU OR SOMEONE YOU KNOW FIT THE PERSONALITY PROFILES?
People with personality disorders can change, but it may take many years of specialized individual psychological psychotherapy to do so. Change is therefore possible, but not likely. What is typical of the personality disorders? People with “serious issues” often:
- Don’t often feel anxious or depressed
- Mostly blame others for their life crises and problems
- Are involved in relationships that are a tumultuous mess
- Perform at work below expectations, and potentials aren’t realized
- Co-workers and family members frequently feel forced to go around them to get things done
- Think of communication as a one-way street
- React defensively to factual criticism or negative feedback
- Exhibit an “I’m always right and why don’t people get on board with the program” bad attitude
- Complain loudly but lack the ability to change or solve problems
- Can make sympathetic bosses, co-workers or partners “try hard to help”
When I was working on my doctorate at the Wright State University School of Professional Psychology in the early 80s, we students often had rousing fun “trying each one on for fit” by role playing how the various “problem personalities” would act and talk. A typical theme of the difficult person is “unawareness.” People with personality disorders really don’t know why they’re doing what they’re doing and customarily act and speak negatively without any chance for change. In fact, when one set of relationship bridges are “blown up,” they simply move to a new set of people or employers who feel sorry for them.
ABOUT DR. ROBERT HOGAN
Dr. Robert Hogan is founder and president of Hogan Assessment Systems, a company in Tulsa, Oklahoma, that uses Hogan’s personality assessment tests to help organizations select employees and develop leaders. Dr. Hogan’s newest book is called “Personality and the Fate of Organizations,” which links personality characteristics to people’s behavior, including their successes and failures in the workplace. The book was published in June 2006 by Lawrence Erlbaum Associates, and should interest anyone who is curious about people, careers and organizational politics. Hogan says: “My goal is to increase the reader’s ability to understand other people: how they are alike, how they are different, and why they do what they do.” The book can be ordered through the publisher’s Web site, www.erlbaum.com. Information about the Hogan Personality Inventory for pre-employment screening purposes is at www.hoganassessments.com. And the Director of Communication for Hogan Assessment Systems is Rolf Olsen at rolsen@hoganassessments.com or by calling #800.756.0632 or #918.749.0632.
ABOUT DR. DENNIS O’GRADY
Dr. Dennis O’Grady is founder and president of New Insights Communication, a company in Dayton, Ohio, that uses O’Grady’s communication systems to help organizations achieve change, improve personal effectiveness and develop responsive leadership and problem-solving tools. Dr. O’Grady’s newest book is called “Talk to Me: Communication Moves to Get Along with Anyone,” which links emotional and attitude preferences and performance obstacles and solutions to communicator type. “Talk to Me” can be ordered through the Web site, www.drogrady.com or by calling 1.937.428.0724.