Do you feel as though you’ve been thrown under the bus? You can bounce back like a rubber tire by using the Talk2Me© leadership communication system. Yeah, Empathizers, or E-types, are only human, and it hurts when you or I get our toes stepped on. But, my dear Instigator, or I-Leader, why can’t you talk to me in the talk style that I prefer, so that I will go the extra mile and smile for you when the chips are down, instead of telling you to go and pound sand? So how does a positive Instigator leader turn on the light of a positive Empathizer follower, you wonder? Simple, but not easy….
HOW A POSITIVE INSTIGATOR-LEADER CAN TURN ON THE LIGHT OF A POSITIVE EMPATHIZER-FOLLOWER
The Instigator communication leader should:
1. Take time to warm up the communicator car engine
2. Not speed off, screeching your tires, if you don’t instantly get your way
3. Groom the texture and tone of the conversation…everyone sits in the front seat
4. Not approach boldly and interrupt gruffly or callously in a demanding tone of voice…don’t give directions unless asked
5. Use ask talk instead of tough talk to get things done quicker…don’t be a backseat driver
6. Make it sound like hardly anything you touch is an emergency…the journey is more important than the destination
7. Not be a dictator but engage in dialogue…enjoy talking as you ride…relax and enjoy the trip of a lifetime
8. Just take a talk minute and discover the personal life of your talk partner…nourish connecting instead of disconnecting
9. Show generous, rather than stingy, signs of regular verbal appreciation…you don’t have to like the long drive to enjoy the ride
AFFIXING BLAME DOESN’T FIX PROBLEMS…OR WHY YOU SHOULDN’T DRIVE IN FRONT OF YOUR HEADLIGHTS ON A DARK NIGHT
If you don’t know Communicator Type Talk Technology, chances are you will witness someone being thrown under the bus as a human sacrifice. Conversely, when you’re no longer ignorant of the Empathizer vs. Instigator motivational preferences, you will have everyone pulling in the same direction and not throwing anyone under the bus as a scapegoat. Why allow your E-followers to lose 50% of their production and motivational energy due to the fear factor? Life’s much more filled with learning new things and fun than that!
ARE YOU PERSON-DRIVEN OR PERFORMANCE-DRIVEN?
Why not take time to talk? Instigators loathe wasting time. I-types are performance-driven and are constantly judging the self against the list of goals and objectives accomplished in the least amount of time. Thus, to I-types at work, it’s nothing personal…it’s only performance-driven. Make it more person-driven, my beloved I-types, and you will find your scores shoot up at least a grade on satisfaction surveys at home and work. Just you try it and see for yourself!
ABOUT “TALK DOC” COMMUNICATIONS PSYCHOLOGIST DENNIS E. O’GRADY, PSY.D.
Dr. O’Grady is the “Talk Doc” and president of the Dayton Area Psychological Association, as well as the developer of the TALK TO ME© positive and effective corporate and personal communication training system. Why invest in a process that will improve your communication skills fast, in both personal and work relationships? When you use the tools and strategies detailed in Talk to Me: Communication Moves to Get Along With Anyone, you’ll find that it’s easy to keep your car in the center of Talk Highway, leaving the ditch to those communicators who shout out, “It’s my way or the highway!”